How I Choose My Friends

It’s a beautiful weekend, today. Welcome back to my blog, friends! Trust you’ve been having a great time this week.

Today, I want to discuss about how I choose my friends. Few weeks back, I discussed about the value of friendship – a very interesting discussion. You can read it up here: The Value of Friendship

One of the qualities I look out for when I choose my friends is alignment of values. The Bible says “Can two work together except they agree?” For sure, whoever is going to be your friend must be someone you have some sort of connection with; or someone who has some qualities that you admire.

It’s not easy to have a good friend. And it takes time to build trust with someone before they become a bosom friend. Friendship is built on trust and love. And just like any meaningful relationship, if you want to have a friend, you must be able to sacrifice things and look beyond yourself.

Even though many people think friendship should be mutual. That is, both parties should be able to enjoy the relationship, which is good. But they should not make it transactional. It’s not about give me and I give you kind of relationship. It is about sharing love and life. It is about having someone of a like mind who you can trust and connect with.

In my experience, I have seen that being committed to a friendship has great benefits (I discussed that in my previous article about the value of friendship). Even though you are not doing something because you want the other person to do it back to you. But it’s just in our nature as humans, that we always like to reciprocate what other people have done to us. We like to do good to those who have done good to us. And this is no mistake. It’s normal. But our intention in friendship should be about working together and helping, developing and adding value to each other.

We know life is not easy living alone. We should connect with people. 

Even I tell people around me that when you want to marry, it’s good you marry someone you love, plus someone who is your friend. Make whoever you want to marry your friend. That’s very important. Not only that it will help your communication and sharing of values and interests, it will also help your growth as a family and foster more bond and unity in your family.

People who don’t have their partners as friends have difficulties coping with the challenges in their marriage. When you have your spouse as your friend, you both see how you can work things together. Just as friends, you will be willing to make good compromise, sacrifice and forgive one another.

Look around you and choose good friends. Make sure they are good people, because you don’t change people. People change themselves. So, it's important to choose the right person from the beginning.

Interact with people and understand their mindsets and ideologies. When they do something, believe them. Don’t doubt what they do or what they say. People often give clue about who they are by their words and actions. So, to understand people, study their words and actions very well and let your discerning spirit make the decision.

It’s good to connect with people. But it’s great to fellowship with friends. People whom you love and care about.

So, I encourage you dear friends to choose your friends well. Let the Spirit of wisdom guide you and show you who your friends should be. I pray you live a great life and fulfill your dreams and purpose on earth. God bless you and have a great weekend!

To read the previous article, please click on this link: Hope Doesn't Disappoint