How to Train Teenagers As A Parent

Warm greetings to you friends. How has your week been? Hope everything is going well. 

Today, I want to share something about how to train teenagers. For me, I still remember vividly how the experience was and the moments involved in training my kids when they were teenagers.

Teenage stage is an interesting and as well challenging period in the lives of children and their parents. It is a period when the growing kids want to feel they are adults and they can do many things on their own without the help of their parents. It is also a time when they are trying to figure out who they are and who they are becoming.

This period espouses rapid changes in their physical and mental growth – which means a lot of things are changing in their body and mind. And because of this, they eat a lot of food. They eat everything and anything.

At this stage, they are so energetic and vibrant. Always wanting to get involved in activities and things that can make them active and alive. It is also a stage where they try a lot of new things.

Very importantly, this period for them is a time when they value relationship with their friends. They want to feel belong, not with their family, but with their friends. So, sometimes, they could be under peer pressure and desire to please friends.

Even though in general, kids are different and they have unique qualities. They are essentially growing through the same episode of biological changes in their body and mind.

For my kids, I had unique experience with each of them because they are all different. Nonetheless, I learned a lot, growing with them.

Usually, at that time, a lot of things that you do as a parent don’t make sense to them and they could easily get angry seeing you doing those things. For instance, it could be something as simple as pricing things in the market. They could ask you – “why are you pricing those things when the price tag is already on them?” They don’t understand it’s not every time the price tag is correct, and the seller may want you to bargain the price, given that negotiation is part of business. Such is life! But they just don’t understand.

There could easily be friction between you and them, and while they think what they are saying is making sense, you only wonder if they know how much they don’t know. The key is to be patient and understanding. There is a need for both tough and soft love. When they do what is right, appreciate them and reward them for it. When they do what is wrong, talk to them gently and let them understand why they shouldn’t do that again.

The key here is communication!

At this stage, teenagers don’t just want to hear what you ask them to do, they want to know why they should do it. Because this is a time when they are growing into adulthood and their sense of reasoning is just becoming alive. So, you no longer want to see them as just kids, but as a growing adults who want to understand life/things in their own terms.

So, when there is communication from time to time, you will get to know their needs and what they are going through. Also, you will learn a lot working with them and the bond between you and them will increase.

Don’t worry if they are pulling away. They will come back when it’s time and appreciate your efforts as their parent. Teenagers hardly express their need for support but they know they can’t do without you. They know you are their parent. And they have no one who can be so responsible and reliable as you.

So, please relax, and let them grow. Give them space and watch them do things. Let them sometimes make decision on their own and let them ask you for help if they need. Be open to conversation and be available to share your time with them. When they piss you off, give them little space and let them ruminate over what they’ve done.

When you are calm, talk to them, and let them know the reason why you are angry and why you don’t want that to be repeated. Teenagers understand words better and can process them more than preteens. So, when you speak to them, believe they understand and ask them questions.

So, those are the ideas I believe can help us as parents in training our teenagers. I pray our children continue to grow in wisdom and understanding, and the Lord will grant them success and excellence in all their endeavors. They will do well and make us proud as their parents. We shall eat the fruit of our labor on them and the Lord will satisfy us with good things. 

To be continued next week. God bless you and have a great week!

To read the previous article, please click on this link: Be Kind!